Victimization and the Mind February 11, 2009

We’ve all played the victim at one time or another in our lives, and if done too much it can become habit forming. When growing up, we experienced victimization with our parents, our teachers, and our government. Then as adults, we had kids, and we become victims to their ill emotions and verbal abuse. We tell them how much they hurt us. We cry in front of them. And we create the child victim. Our children then become the victims to their parents. They become the victim at school and on the streets. It’s a vicious cycle that needs to be broken.

Sometimes it takes our stepping back and looking deeply into ourselves to see if we’re still playing the victim in our household. If we’re always acting like we’re hurt, we need to change it. If our parents played the roles with us, we need to recognize this, and reverse the pattern. We don’t want to turn our children into society’s victims. Victims end up in prison, the morgue, and worse. Crying wolf too many times.

 

Thirteen and Morphine September 24, 2008

Many of us believe we don’t have the time or the energy to keep up with what our kids are up to. As parents, we feel overburdened with work and overwhelmed with the traumas that affect our daily lives. We find that we’ve lost touch with not only ourselves but with the reality of who our kids have become and what they’re thinking. As a society, it’s costing us dearly. Prisons are filling with our offspring. Youthful offenders under the age of 18 account for over 20 percent of all violent crimes committed in this country. In the last 10 years juvenile arrests for violence have increased by 75 percent.

Juvenile arrests for weapons violations increased by 103 percent. Illegal drug use by teens has increased by 150 percent and the number of juveniles admitting to having used drugs in the past month has more than doubled. These statistics affect everyone. Children fear in school violence. Parents fear their kids won’t return home at night. And the statistics are only getting worse. So what can we do about it? There’s plenty, and it starts with a little compassion, and a lot of time devoted to the most important investment of our lives: our children.