Becoming A Fearless Person September 17, 2008

Everyday  I talk to professionals around the United States and everywhere else who are  unemployed, or desire a significant career change, or perhaps, like me, want to expand the work I  already have, may notice things are not happening as fast as you had hoped. Take heart! You are not a failure and there is nothing wrong with you regardless of what anyone says!

 

Recently I listened to a woman harshly chastising herself in a bookstore; “I’ve been avoiding doing what is necessary to get my new career going – I haven’t written cover letters, made the necessary contacts, and have even sabotaged myself by stopping my daily runs. I sabotage myself by reading and sewing rather than doing what needs to be done!”

 

Sensing the pressure this woman felt from that militant voice, empathy stirred my heart. Well, I know the pressure of trying to accomplish anything with that hard, judging energy pushing me along. As I gently asked this woman if she felt pressured listening to these critical demands; her eyes welled and a sob caught in her throat.

 

Our self-help, goal-oriented, hard-driven society filled with so-called steps-to-success applauds this constant self-analysis and pushing to succeed. If we are avoiding doing something perhaps, we really don’t want to do it or it is not the right time. Perhaps, this woman quit her daily runs because they were excessive and more balance was needed in her life. And in this instance, I know the so-called avoidance behavior of reading and sewing is a very soulful pastime for this woman.

 

We are so quick to be angry with ourselves if we are not constantly striving toward success and overcoming our blocks and fears. When we believe this harsh energy is the way, we have lost our Way. Stop and listen. Where do these callous comments emanate from… the head or the heart?

 

Clearly, the head is in control. If you are feeling pressured ‘to do’ by your own harsh thoughts, recognize them as just thoughts and let them go. God, your Higher Power, true Self, The Way, call it as you will, does not speak to us through judging, driving thoughts.

 

The Higher Power is the small still voice of your heart. Let this gentle, loving energy be your guide rather than the harsh, driven energy of “self-will run riot” as they say in Narcotics Anonymous.

 

When I let go and refuse to act upon harsh energy bullying me then, later, unexpected urges of inspiration well up and I simply act upon them. What needs to be done, gets done, and I have a sense of flowing with things rather than feeling pressured and jammed.

 

Meditate to release the pressures of your day.  Lightly follow your breathing in, and breathing out. Then, literally, listen. This act of listening is a doorway to the meditative state to the Higher Power. As you listen, then turn your listening inwards. Feel the expansive calm.

 

In this still place, in prayer, ask for help and listen more. To live a life of integrity we must stop pushing ourselves and let the Higher Power within for our direction and inspiration. We simply need to be willing and to let the Higher Power know: Thy will be done – not mine!

 

 

 

Faith, Grief and God September 9, 2008

Many people today have lost jobs after decades of service; many others suffer within jobs they can see no way out of.   In order to survive a painful job loss – indeed, any type of painful loss – one must grieve and come to some acceptance.

 

How does one find acceptance amidst the humiliation, shame, despair, fear, grief and uncertainty a job loss can invoke? How does one accept financial insecurity threatening their lives, accomplishments and family?

 

Rarely, can one will skip over painful feelings, wave a magic wand and create new career or dutiful employment in short order. Often, people want to escape difficult life situations avoid any sort of emotional breakdown.  In reality if a person goes against the grain in resisting to accepting the situation, they find themselves fighting with their inner soul and the world around them.   Accepting things and situations as they are is one major path to recover from emotional disasters.

 

When I went to Narcotics Anonymous, and it was written in one of the big books of Alcoholics Anonymous,   “Acceptance is the answer to all my problems today… I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is suppose to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in God’s world by mistake.”

 

How does a person force themselves into peaceful acceptance?   They really can’t unless they learn to let go and letting go is a difficult major obstacle to overcome.

 

I’ve learned so much in the past 15 months, that we as individuals can not force ourselves to a peaceful acceptance without first experiencing a volatile emotional journey.    When I started my journey towards healing from the past,   I was almost forced to let go of the attempt to figure out the “whys” in everything.  As I found out, a lot of people who are uncertain or have followed a volatile path in life tend to internalize everything.    So I started to seek trust in myself, my decisions, and in the higher power. 

 

I began to realize that life’s experience have a specific person, though it may be beyond my knowledge , and to overcome my acceptance of things and situations as they are,  helped pave my life in a different direction.    The instant I realized that I was holding virtues that I cannot solve or understand.  When I let that go, my heart healed and as a result, my life moved in a better path.  I became somewhat at peace with myself, my life and my new path.

 

Author Unknown Wrote the following poem –

 

“My life is but a weaving between my Lord and me.
I cannot choose the colors He worketh steadily.
Of times He weaveth sorrow, and I in foolish pride
Forget He sees the upper and I, the underside.
Not till the loom is silent and the shuttles cease to fly
Shall God unroll the canvas and explain the reason why.
The dark threads are as needful in the
Weaver’s skillful hand
As the threads of gold and silver in the
pattern He has planned.”

 

I began to inspire others, young and elder, to become aware of their lives and begin the journey to healing, acceptance, and having faith in the higher power.